I’ve been absent from this space lately. I’ve fallen out of the habit of coming to the spaces that I’ve created for myself.
You see, I always wanted to be a writer. I dreamed of having a quiet, carved out nook where I would peacefully inscribe my thoughts upon paper. Little did I realize that the life of a writer is much more chaotic.
Now that I write for a living (among other things) I’ve become much more realistic about life. Instead of quiet spaces and long focus times, it’s quickly jotting thoughts down and then organizing them later. That’s my style at least. And it works.
What I never realized is when you spend your time writing for someone else, you neglect writing for yourself. And my struggle with reclaiming my own creative space has haunted me throughout the years.
I’m finally starting to come to terms with my own balance. With realizing that living a balanced life doesn’t mean doing every single thing all the time. Balance is about constantly shifting. And right now I’m trying to shift back towards myself. And it’s hard. Especially with a family, with maintaining a place we call home. With creating a life that I consider to be full.
I’m also realizing that it takes patience and prioritization. I’m great at prioritizing things for work, for my house and for my schedule. But not necessarily for myself. And if you know me, you know that patience is a virtue that I’m committed to improving. Let’s face it, I want to be able to do it all and right now. And admitting that it’s not always possible is something I still need to work on.